We have a billboard in our area. On the top of this billboard are the words, 'Men's Divorce Law Firm'. It is advertising a local legal firm that assists men in divorce.
OK, I need to be gracious here, just a little. I do understand that there are men who have been ripped off by their wives. They didn't ask for the divorce, and the ex wife is now trying to twist the legal system so the ex husband will not have custody of the children that were born to them in the marriage.
Why do we have so many divorces in our country today? Before the late '60s, divorce was rare. Although it happened, there was usually a logical reason if a divorce had to take place. Not so today.
I have heard that a well known Christian artist wanted our of her marriage, simply because she didn't love her husband any more. Another well known Christian artist went to counseling where she was told that God created marriage for 2 people to enjoy each other to the fullest. If you are not happy in your marriage, then you need to get out of it. She got out and married someone else. Her first marriage was too hard because she was not happy in it. There were problems there, much like most people have in their marriages. She deserved someone better.
What happened to the word of God, concerning marriage? Does God tell us to get out of our marriage because we are not happy or we do not love our spouse anymore? The problem goes way deeper from the depths of our hearts.
Today, society tells us to do whatever makes us happy. Society does not teach us to work through hard issues and situations that are handed to us in life. If something is too hard, then we are encouraged to take the easy way out. We are also taught that we are entitled to a good life. We deserve better than a marriage we are not happy with.
Sadly, some churches today have bought into the lie that says, "When culture and Scripture do not agree, then Scripture must bow to culture." I have a hard time believing that professing Christians would believe this, but sadly it is true.
Both concepts of seeking happiness and the easy way out, and the idea of entitlement are not from God, and you will not find them in the Scriptures. God loves His people too much to allow them to live a cushioned, self-centered life.
Children from divorced homes do suffer. The parents are suffering the consequences of divorce in their own lives, that they are struggling to work through. Children are often neglected because of the parents preoccupation with themselves trying to work through their own issues. Don't let anyone fool you into thinking that children do ok even when their parents divorce. They don't do ok. They may be quiet or even unwilling to talk about it, but they will feel the affects sooner or later. Some of those affects could be serious, like wanting to commit suicide, or blaming themselves for their parents inability to stay together as a family.
What is the answer to all this? First, we have to fear God. Without the fear of the Lord, we will never want to be changed. We will try to control our own lives, they way we think is best. Second, we have to learn that we are not born in order to live self-centered lives. We were born to be worshipers of the true and living God. The problem is, we can't worship God or even get to know Him until we are born again. We are not born again until we are willing to give up the 'rights' to ourselves and let go of our selfishness and pride. God must be the foundation of our lives. We must be Christ centered. Jesus is on the throne. We have to come to the place where we can acknowledge His rule in our lives. Third, we have to take the difficult situations in life and work through them. In some ways, it seems like when we come to know the Lord, we are given puzzles to put together. We have to figure out where the pieces go. When it is finished, it makes a beautiful picture. So many times, we just have these pieces of the puzzle, and have no idea that they are to be put together to make a bigger picture. We have to learn to do hard things! But we have to learn to do them by living in the grace of God, with the power of God in our lives. We can never live a productive life, spiritually speaking, unless we are empowered by God and living in His grace.
There was a saying on the back of a Power magazine, that I had received years ago. I don't remember much about the article, but it was on marriage. The last words of the article were this; Lord, change my marriage and let it begin with me. (The words were similar, but I can't remember the exact phrase).